By: Julia Pulver, RN
For the second time in my life, the U.S. Supreme Court has issued a landmark decision that puts in jeopardy my right to make highly private and personal medical decisions without government interference.
As a woman, I saw the Court’s Dobbs decision to overturn Roe v. Wade, holding that the right to an abortion was not protected by the U.S. Constitution, as a direct assault on my right to any reproductive care that my doctors and I determine is best for me. Now, as the mother of a trans teenager, there is a second-right-depriving ruling that also causes incredible personal concern: U.S. v. Skrmetti, which clears the way for states to impose deeply dangerous laws that block trans teens from receiving treatments vital to their wellbeing.
My reactions to both decisions have been much the same: feelings of outrage, fear, heartache.
A nurse of more than 20 years, I’m also experiencing mind-bending frustration over how both rulings fly in the face of decades of well-established evidence proving the safety and efficacy of reproductive healthcare and various therapies for trans youth.
Then there’s the unfathomable scorn I feel for politicians from any party who, for whatever made-up reason, find political gain in villainizing trans children. No one should find that acceptable.
One of the things giving me hope, is how Michiganders responded to the Dobbs ruling. We rallied to ensure that people in our state would retain access to reproductive health care by voting to amend the Michigan Constitution, etching abortion protection into law.
Now, in a way that is chillingly similar to Dobbs, the Supreme Court, in its Skrmetti decision, is endangering my right to make medical decisions for my child.
In Skrmetti, the Court upheld a Tennessee law that bans gender affirming care for minors, eliminating the ability of parents to work with healthcare providers and mental health experts to ensure that the children under their care are able to receive needed treatment
As a longtime nurse, I know that neither the Dobbs nor the Skrmetti decision was made because of any new medical standards or evidence-based best practices. Just the opposite is true: In both cases, a majority of justices not only ignored the voluminous amount of valid research showing the real-world harm that would result from allowing the government to dictate what can be life-or-death medical decisions, they also gave credibility to junk science manufactured by people with an anti-trans agenda.
Regarding abortion, the only reason I still retain the ability to make medical decisions for myself and my child without government interference by non-medical, unlicensed politicians is because the state of Michigan is doing what its residents demand: protecting our rights from government intrusion into personal medical matters.
But the fact that my son and I are currently protected does not limit my fury over the effect the insulting, heartless and cruel Skrmetti decision will inevitably have on trans children and their families living in less-enlightened states.
Since when did it become acceptable for politicians to attack children like this?
The other question is why: I think the answer is obvious. The politicians villainizing trans people, including vulnerable children, believe it will help them win elections.
These relentless attacks are extremely personal, and hurtful, to me, my husband Ben, our son, Jason, and the rest of our family. What makes the emotions we’re feeling even more acute is the knowledge that so much of this would evaporate if the politicians pushing these hateful and harmful policies, and every person sucked into believing the lies being spread, somehow had a chance to know our son.
Jason was born full term, completely healthy and assigned female. Right after pre-school, he started rejecting all things feminine, which took the form of not wanting his older sister’s “hand me downs,” and wanting to cut his hair short. Around the age of 5, he began telling us that he wished he was a boy because he wanted to do “boy things.” We assured him that that girls could do anything boys did.
By the 8th grade, he’d decided to start using a different name and he/him pronouns as he started living life as the boy he always knew himself to be. Prior to that, Jason struggled with anger and depression. But once he made those changes, we started noticing a 180-degree transformation in his mood and outlook. This improvement gave us reassurance that we were doing right by him.
As Jason progressed in high school, his desire to further live as his authentic self led him to request adding testosterone to his transition plan. Ben, Jason and I, along with his mental and medical health providers, discussed the risks and benefits of testosterone therapy and set realistic treatment goals. It has been a collaborative, deliberate effort spanning several years. I’m happy to report that Jason started receiving hormone replacement therapy (HRT) this year and since then, he is absolutely thriving. He loves theater, choir, and his natural desire to help people is leading him to a career as a firefighter. He is a kind human being with a beautiful soul who only wants to be accepted for who he is.
However, at this very moment, politicians who don’t know Jason want you to hate him so much that you look the other way while they pass bills aimed at hurting him. I remember a time when innocent children were supposed to be off limits as political targets. Now it seems that everyone is fair game where cruelty reigns, and anyone who opposes it is too “weak and woke” to matter.
Regardless of their hate, Jason will continue chipping away at the nefarious lies being spread about him by simply going out into the world and being himself. People like Ben and I will keep telling the story of our family in hopes it will help break through all the scare tactics being used to make our fellow Americans hate and fear our son. We won’t ever stop trying to create an America that accepts our trans siblings for who they really are – our fellow human beings only seeking their chance to pursue their own happiness in peace.